Scenes from Airport Security Lines

Flight #1:
Security guy: Ma’am we need to search your bag.
Me: Ok sure.
Security guy: What the hell do you have in here??
Me: Uh….OH a stainless steel coffee mug!
Woman in line behind me: damn…that’s one hell of a coffee addiction
Security guy: Next time warn a guy! That thing looks BAD on the xray.
Me: oh uh sorry.

Flight #2:
*I had gotten rid of coffee mug and was HOPING not to be stopped….sigh

Security guy: Ma’am we need to search your bag.
Me: Ok sure. (waiting….waiting…waiting….while they search)
Security guy: (bringing bag back to me) Everything looks good, but I have one important question.
Me: Uh ok.
Security guy: (holding up my Fiber One Poptart box) Are these as good as regular poptarts?
Me: hahahaa no…but they ARE good and healthier.
Security guy: I’ll stick to the real ones.
Me: Good choice.